Ending the Year with a Strong Parent Partnership

One key end-of-the-year objective for teachers is to bring parent partnerships to a positive conclusion. All year long teachers have worked diligently to facilitate these relationships. From first contact at a back-to-school event to parent-teacher conferences to ad hoc meetings, teachers have likely interfaced with parents on a number of occasions. To end the year positively, teachers do well to think through how to complete this partnership on a strong note.

Most teachers, of course, do not enter education because of their passion to partner with parents. However, it does not take long for a new teacher to realize that one key factor for a successful year is going to be this relationship. Philosophically, this is natural because parents are the primary stewards of their children and possess key insights about their development. And, at a more pragmatic level, independent school parents are paying a premium for their child’s education and expect to be informed and, to some extent, involved throughout the year.

To end the year well, master teachers provide closure with parents regarding their child’s growth and development. Whether this happens formally at an end-of-year parent-teacher conference or through a different form of intentional conversation, teachers can leave parents feeling grateful and deeply appreciative. In this article I will offer three particular ways teachers can build upon the partnership they have cultivated through the year with parents, so that everyone can leave for the summer on a positive note.

1. Demonstrate your understanding of the parents’ hopes and fears for their child.

In Understanding Independent School Parents (Wise Teacher Press, 2012), psychologist Michael G. Thompson and teacher Alison Fox Mazzola map out the core principles of a successful family school relationship. This relationship, the authors note, is complex. But with some foresight and planning, teachers can build strong alliances with parents.

One suggestion is, at the beginning of the year, to ask parents about their hopes and fears for their children. It is common for teachers to feel the pressure to perform in their interactions with parents. Whether it is demonstrating their knowledge of the curriculum or sharing insights about their students, teachers often err on the side of dominating the parent partnership with their own voice. But Dr. Thompson suggests that the key to a productive relationship of any kind is to first build trust by seeking to understand what the person is hoping for or worried about. Taking time to listen, and listening well, is the key to forging a strong partnership from the beginning.

Then, at the end of the year, a teacher can reference these desires in her conversation to wrap up the year. For example, a teacher might share with a parent, “At the beginning of the year, you mentioned a concern that your son would continue to struggle in math. Well, as you know, there have been some bumps this year. But there have also been some real victories that I would like to remind us about. This is worth celebrating together.”

When parents feel heard and understood, they are much more likely to trust and respect their child’s teacher throughout the year. Then, at the end of the year, the partnership can conclude with shared appreciation and gratitude for the journey together.

2. Debrief the plan you implemented in collaboration with parents to help the child grow.

It is a common mantra in the business world to underpromise and overdeliver. This insight can, to some degree, be applied in the parent-teacher partnership. It is important to not hubristically claim that any one teacher can “fix” a child or solve a learning problem after years of struggle. There are no guarantees when dealing with humans, no sure-fire way to guarantee a particular outcome, whether it be a particular grade, college acceptance, or habit development. Teachers are therefore wise to not overpromise what they cannot deliver with certainty.

At the same time, at the beginning of the year, teachers can instill confidence with parents through crafting a specific plan to help a child grow in a key area. Identify a root obstacle in the way of a child’s growth and then share a proposed strategy for collaborative implementation. This is what Dr. Thompson calls “claiming a child.” After all, parents partner with schools because they want their children to be known, loved, and educated. While “educated” is a vague term, as classical educators we can think of all the ways we support whole-person growth: habit formation, character and spiritual development, the cultivation of friendships, skill mastery, knowledge acquisition, and more.

Teachers can end the year on a strong note with parents by revisiting the plan they agreed upon at the beginning of the year. This communicates to parents, first, consistency in the teacher’s plan for the year, and second, that the teacher has been thoroughly committed to helping the child grow. By debriefing the plan at the end of the year, both teacher and parents can conclude the partnership with a sense of clarity and accomplishment about everyone’s hard work throughout the year.

3. Demonstrate professionalism and respect through the last day of school.

It may be impossible to go back in time and do over again a particular parent-teacher conference that did not go as planned. But it is never too late to step up one’s professionalism when interacting with parents.

Like it or not, independent schools are service organizations. Terms are clarified, the enrollment agreement is signed, tuition is collected, and the service is provided over the course of the school year. Parents pay a particular amount and expect a value in proportion to what they have paid. And while there are no guarantees in education–teachers do not have full control over whether a child passes math or overcomes a particular character flaw–parents can and should expect their interactions with teachers to be professional and respectful.

One way teachers can demonstrate their professionalism is through having effective and respectful conversations with parents. For parent-teacher conferences, this includes keeping track of the time, having an agenda prepared in advance, sharing student work in an organized and confident manner, and listening to parent opinions respectfully. Similarly, in phone conversations, teachers should strive to listen well, communicate the agenda up front, and be sensitive to the direction the conversation is going.

At the end of the year, teachers can conclude the parent partnership on a strong note by asking, “How have you seen your child grow this year? Do you have any concerns or questions as we wrap up this year? How can I help you and your child leave for the summer feeling at peace about the year?” Asking these sorts of questions helps parents process the year, including the victories, challenges, and perhaps unresolved questions. This processing then leads to clarity and an inner sense of gratitude about their relationship with the teacher.

Conclusion

There are many joys of working in education, but in my experience, the greatest joy of all is the myriad of relationships that are formed over the course of the year. While for many teachers the parent partnership can be a source of stress, it does not have to be. By implementing the guidance outlined in this article, both teachers and parents can depart for the summer with a sense of gratitude and deep appreciation for how the Lord worked in and through the partnership, and ultimately, in the life of the child.

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